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14 January 2009

Tell me what you see right now



You got it all wrong because it wasn't about forgiveness. Not even about the mirror, it's broken for so many years that I can't not even at this moment take it next to me. I only hurt myself when I try to take it back and there's only blood all around me. You're saying you've been there before but it's not the same. The center of the world? My own world? You wanna say my own.... nightmare. The one I'm living for so many years. You don't wanna come back because it's too diffrent. Anyway nice said, nice words, I couldn't never write like this... You wanna know why? Because my words are finished.... long time ago. I can read between the lines even if I was blind... or not. Soulmates really die I'm convinced right now. Forgive myself? I will never forgive myself and it's not about what happened between us two, it's about..... about myself and my demons, the ones I can not kill, maybe I'm not strong enought to do that. You're stronger then me or this is just an impression? The time to enjoy the nightmare? I shall fully enjoy it 'cause I know I'm the only one who can erase, kill, stop, leave.... all of that nightmare. Him, you, me.... I'm not sure, now I just like the darkness which surrounds me right now. He'll be so happy when he'll see he was right. He's always right even if I was lost in him for so many years that I can not remember the smell of joy or the spring's taste. Something's happening to me... I'm not sure what.... You tell me what you see right now... by looking in your own mirror. As I just said mine is broken. It will remain like this until I'll wake up.

1 comment:

sebastian said...

Last night I was dreaming when you wanted to talk to me..You got this all wrong...and you can never be embraced in the darkness like I do. Stop this hurting of yourself, it`s not good for your soul..And soul mates never dies. Remember the word IMZADI? The ultimate lover. Tell me who is your IMZADI?